Drinks Like a Fish, Smokes like a Chimney, Smokes Trout like a...

This is a nothing post...
It's a post that is born from boredom, alienation and fiscal restraint. In other words I've got nothing on and I'm skint.
So here's yet another pithy list of things that may or may not relate to you and your vastly more exciting world:


If Gustave Doré were alive today I bet he'd have a pretty good chance of working for the film industry or maybe he'd like a change of pace and look into the Department of Agriculture, Fisheries and Forestry.

If I was a thief I'd wear a soft black mask, a black and white stripy top (only vertical because it's more slimming) and I'd steal kisses.

Sometimes a month after I have finished a cigar I like to un-cap the metal container and smell the inside. Kinda coffee/vanilla/gum cancer smelling.

When will SBS show Professor Balthazar?

Why is Myspace filled with other people - surely it should be called Their Space.

Imagine if you could bottle lightning? You could wrap a "Peanuts" wrapper around it and when somebody opened it - ZAP! - hilarious, people look funny with no eyebrows.

Can you ever really "know" somebody - I mean really know somebody?? I'm not kidding - I mean reallllllllllly KNOW somebody - SOMEbody - KNOW! .................I think it's highly unlikely.

Why are they called "Stand Up" comedians? Do we have Stand Up Surgeons? Lying down Mechanics, Sit Down Bank Tellers? No. Although I have heard of Slightly Bent Coppers.

Sigh. Have a good day people.
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